Friday, 15 June 2012

Guest Post: Paranormal Parties by J.L.Bryan

Today I have author J.L. Bryan with a guest post about Paranormal Parties

About Jeff
J.L. Bryan studied English literature at the University of Georgia and at Oxford, with a focus on the English Renaissance and the Romantic period. He also studied screenwriting at UCLA. He enjoys remixing elements of paranormal, supernatural, fantasy, horror and science fiction into new kinds of stories.

He is the author of The Paranormals series of horror novels (Jenny Pox, Tommy Nightmare, and Alexander Death) the Songs of Magic series for younger readers (Fairy Metal Thunder, Fairy Blues, and far) and other books. He lives in Atlanta with his wife Christina, their son, and some dogs and cats.

Find Jeff

Jeff's Books

Paranormal Parties
At a time like this, when you’re in the middle of a blog event focused on celebrations, you can’t help but wonder, “How do goblins celebrate special events?” Well, maybe nobody’s wondering that. But paranormal creatures are different from us—they still have forms of government centered on monarchy, for example. It should come as no surprise that paranormals have unique forms of celebrating, too.

After months of intensive research, I am pleased to present this guide to how the paranormal party:

When you’ve just killed the chief vampire hunter in your region, it’s Miller time (as we know, Dracula never drinks wine).  Traditional vampire parties can be chilly events in medieval castles, but in more recent times they’ve been known to hang out in dark and trendy nightclubs, looking cool in black leather and giving everyone an icy stare.  Sometimes, though, vampires just like to relax at home with a good book and a warm bloodbath.

Unlike snooty vampire events, werewolf parties are a howlin’ good time. Running through the woods, barking at the moon, chasing their own tails...and don’t forget the snacks! Modern suburban werewolves might smoke a side of mammal on the grill, but their country cousins say they’ve gone soft, and nothing beats the taste of a raw, fresh-killed something or other.

The cranky ultra-elderly of the paranormal world, mummies usually feel like celebrating after they've successfully shouted at neighborhood kids to get off their lawn. A mummy good time includes bran cereal, Ben-Gay, and watching reruns of Matlock. For a true indulgence: fresh bandaging, followed by getting locked in a dark room for a thousand years.

Nobody parties like the fairies! Music, dancing, singing, feasting, and drinking, every night forever. Their music is so powerful it can entrance humans and lure them down into the dangerous fairy world. If you go to a fairy party, you’ll have such a great time that you’ll barely notice as the centuries slip by.

As promised, a peek into the goblin world, where no party would be complete without pitchers of sour milk and platters full of worms and fish guts! Goblins enjoy games like “Bobbing for Garbage” and “Pin the Tail on That Annoying Guy.” Their revels usually wind down with a bottle of port and a lengthy discussion of Proust.

Now, when you’re invited to that next big supernatural event, you’ll know just what to expect!  Remember to wear comfortable clothing and a sturdy pair of running shoes.

J.L. Bryan is the author of the Paranormals trilogy Jenny Pox,Tommy Nightmare, and Alexander Death and the Songs of Magic series (Fairy Metal Thunder, Fairy Blues,Fairystruck, and Fairyland). Jenny Pox is free on Kindle today!

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thank you for taking a few moments to comment.
Comments mean love and make the world go round so don't be shy :)

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...